Like this:

“This is what the LORD says:
“Heaven is my throne,
and the earth is my footstool.
Where is the house you will build for me?
Where will my resting place be?” Isaiah 66:1

I recognize the great need for relationship and touch more keenly than usual these days…We were made for love, and to deeply feel life but so often for lack of time, priority, or open eyes, we miss it. I miss it.

Today I spent a long time reading about a young girl in Uganda http://kissesfromkatie.blogspot.com/2009/08/it-is-my-16th-birthday-and-i-am-eating.html Her name is Katie and she is a 21 year old mother of 14 orphaned children, and her selflessness wrecks my way toward self sufficiency and ease that I daily pursue even unknowingly.

You see dear ones, I live in a city that screams “You can!” You CAN: make your own way, have it all and more, live without bounds or consequence, get to the top o so fast, see your needs met by your own hand…New York is such a lovely Nebuchadnezzar (Daniel 3-4:28-36) shiny, lofty, and sooo many bow–as the music plays on day by day…the sound track to a self-absorbed culture. My nation is blind, my people are thick with the food of idleness and regret. We medicate our loneliness with overwhelming light, sound, and touch–attempting to satisfy a craving put there by Creator for fascination and fulfillment. I am overwhelmed by my own lack of motivation in the midst of such great need! How is it that I can so easily let hours–precious and few–my only voice–slip away even here in my powerful youth, when there are so many just waiting for me to bring them a lasting answer.

Haiti’s not enough? Katie in Uganda is not enough? Jesus come to earth lived and died, risen again for my sake…not enough to cause me to daily, hourly, every moment LIVE in light and life, motivated passion…doing what I am here for?

Temporary satisfaction

Oh father, Beautiful God, reveal the dark for what it is in all it’s beguiling allurement. Show me the beautiful way that I desperately crave. Let me not waste my hours, especially in my youth. Cover my eyes when evil insists, my ears when lies invade, shelter my heart when idleness ensues…I want it all, to learn for real–that love filled and abandoned to the core–SERVANTHOOD is the only solution. I want to look like Jesus, in this city, in my world, in your Kingdom COME to earth.

If I can not do this, my life is a waste.

I repent to you today for every pattern that produces and appears thus.

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